HIP HIP HIP

MY WIFE IS GOING FOR A 

HIP REPLACEMENT

NEXT Monday

TO-DAY

NORMALY I DO NOT COMPLAIN ABOUT

THE NATIONAL HEALTH SERVICE

BUT TO-DAY WHILST I WAS

@ CENTRAL METHODIST CHURCH

I MET AN OLD FRIEND WHO TOLD ME

THAT HE HAD BEEN ADMITTED

TO CALDERDALE ROYAL HOSPITAL

HAVING SUFFERED A STROKE

WHILST HE WAS RECOVERING

HE GOT PNEUMONIA

TO-DAY

TO-DAY I HAVE BEEN TO SEE PRACTICE NURSE JANINE SUMNER WHO TELLS ME THAT MY DIABETIC & GENERAL HEALTH

HAVE NEVER BEEN BETTER

I DONT HAVE TO GO AGAIN UNTIL CHRISTMAS

POULTRY TALK

WHAT DO THE NORMAL CHICKENS SAY
                                      COCK A DOODLE DOO
WHAT DO THE DYSLEXIC CHICKENS SAY
                                             DOODLE DOODLE COCK
WHAT DO THE NYMPHOMANIAC CHICKENS SAY
                                                      ANY COCK 'LL  DO   !

SAD NEWS

I Have just heard of the sad death of one of my ex- work colleagues

His name was Joe Fairbrother, who worked in the general office of Hoechst UK when we were at Holywell Brook. He was one of the few people who used to call me "Dave" His immediate boss was a man called Richard who insisted on being called Dick

This gave rise to a great deal of Fun. When wanting to borrow an eraser they would say "Have you got a rubber on your dick",

If requiring a few seconds of his time, they would say "Have you got a  second dick.

The funiest thing of all was when the General Manager wanted to contact him, said to his secretary "Can you raise  Dick for me"